Luke 10:38-42
38 Now as [Jesus and his disciples] went on their way, he entered a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him. 39 She had a sister named Mary, who sat at Jesus’s feet and listened to what he was saying. 40 But Martha was distracted by her many tasks, so she came to him and asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her, then, to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things, 42 but few things are needed—indeed only one. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.
Reflection
“Don’t
be such a Martha!”
I first heard that phrase as a kid. We were visiting friends of the family, and the man of the house was sitting in the living room, beer in hand, watching football on the TV while talking about football players and football plays with the other men in the room. The woman of the home came into the room and asked if the man could help in the kitchen.
“Hold on, I gotta' finish this story,” he said and then proceeded to continue to discuss football.
The woman stood there for a moment, waited, and then reiterated, “Now?”
And, then he uttered the phrase that became such a mystery to my young self.
“Don’t be such a Martha!”
I had no idea at the time what he was referencing. And, considering that we were in a small town, and I had never seen him in church, I assume that he probably had no idea either.
Poor, bossy, and distracted Martha. She would enjoy football more if only she just sat down.
Just for fun, I Googled the phrase, “Don’t be such a Martha” and the phrase is all over the place. Most often, it is the first line found on pastor’s newsletter articles and blogs. And, they all seem to share the same lame joke as well, “Don’t be such a Martha, unless your name is Martha.”
And, as of today, the phrase and lame joke is in yet another pastor’s online sermon blog. Mine.
Given the bad rap that Martha seems to get, I would just like to mention right away that there is nothing wrong happening in this story between Mary, Martha, and Jesus. In fact, a lot is going right in this story.
Jesus has come as a guest, and is sharing what guests are supposed to share in the ancient world, stories and wisdom. That is good.
Martha appears to be a great hostess. The Bible makes sure to note in Luke 10:38 that she “welcomes him,” in contrast to Simon the Pharisee who in Luke, chapter 7 very pointedly does not show hospitality to Jesus. Simon tries to embarrass him by not welcoming him and not washing his feet as was customary. Simon tries to discount Jesus. But, Martha loves Jesus and is doing many things around the home, including, presumably cooking a meal, so that her guest is well fed and made to feel comfortable and loved. That is good.
And, let us not forget her sister, Mary, who is sitting “at Jesus’ feet and listening to what he [is] saying” (Luke 10:39). Mary is with Jesus, making him feel welcome and attended to. That is good.
The hosts are serving and entertaining, the guest is sharing, there just simply is nothing wrong going on in this scene. In fact, it is all going quite perfect. There is so much going right.
But, as you know all too well, perfection in life usually lasts for but a moment. Like an audience member who decides to sing along at the concert, one step lower than those who actually know what how to sing, Martha decides that she has something to say to Jesus.
Pointing to Mary, who is sitting at Jesus’ feet, Martha says to Jesus, "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me" (Luke 10:40). I guess the scene is not so perfect. In Martha’s mind, there is a slacker on the loose. Mary is just sitting there while she, good old dependable Martha, does all of the work!
I have actually seen this exact story play out after I became a pastor and was invited into a family’s home. Do not worry, it was none of you. I was talking to one of the adults in the home, and it was a nice conversation. Notice I am not indicating whether it was the man or the woman, to protect the guilty. The other adult walked in from the kitchen and said politely in my presence, “Excuse me, honey could you please come in and make yourself useful.”
I do have to admit that it was the kind of polite voice that is actually quite the opposite of polite. You know what I mean. It was the kind of polite that uses a nice tone but is accompanied by murderous eyes.
After the eye daggers, both adults were gone and I was just sitting there listening to the uncomfortable bickering unfolding in the kitchen. Trying not to listen to the not so quiet hushed tones, I was left alone in the living room to look at the artwork on the walls and appreciate it for a really, really, really, long time. There is only so long that you can appreciate a little bridge with autumn leaves, created by the fine artists of trailer home art. Eventually, little fingers came out of nowhere holding a stuffed animal and a little voice said, “Pastor, do you want to come to my room and help me put lotion on my teddy bear, he’s really dry.” Who can pass up the offer to help put lotion on a teddy bear?
Now, let me stop and say that there is nothing wrong with serving other people. Heck, we just heard the story of the Good Samaritan last week where Jesus encourages us to serve our neighbors. Doing something for another person’s wellbeing is very good.
But, in Martha’s case, there is a problem. In an effort to serve her guest more efficiently, Martha actually forgets about her guest. Jesus is right there in the room, and she misses out completely on what Jesus has to offer her as the guest. She is distracted from the stories and wisdom. God is right there with her, and she does not pay attention.
Jesus tells Martha, “You are worried and distracted by many things” (Luke 10:41). Martha sees that Jesus is there, of course. She even goes as far as blaming Jesus for keeping Mary from helping. “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself?” (Luke 10:40). She sees that he is there, but she fails to allow him to truly be with her. Jesus is graciously in the room, that is the good news, but Martha is distracted from him, that is that bad news.
In our modern world of amazing technology and smart appliances, it is amazing just how that technology free us from our work so that we can spend time with the people who really matter, and never get distracted! I wish that were true.
You have seen our culture. If you could choose one word to describe us as a culture these days, you could quite rightly choose, “distracted.” We have all seen the couple out on the romantic dinner date, texting instead of looking and talking with one another.
We have all seen the family in the park with the three year old balancing on the swing set, six feet in the air, and the rest of the family sitting in the grass with their heads in their phones. Listen, I am not pointing fingers. I am just as guilty.
You do not even need a smart phone to be distracted. We have all seen the schedules that most families are trying to hold together: soccer, meetings, volunteering, family obligations, friends, music lessons, confirmation lessons, horse lessons, the list of activities go on and on and on. We are a distracted people. And, retirees, you do not get to look so smug. We all know that the word retired is a conjunction of two words meaning “tired again.” Re-Tired.
“Don’t be such a Martha.”
Listen. To all of us Marthas out there, it is not that any of these things are necessarily bad. Soccer and baseball expose kids to teamwork (a Christian ideal by the way; modeling the body of Christ). And, children’s activities expose kids to another adult, someone outside of the family, who loves them and cares…the coaches and teachers. This is important, meaningful stuff. This is holy stuff.
Time spent volunteering for the arts, or at the food bank, or teaching children to read is all good. Spending time taking care of family members who are ill, or who just need someone there, is all good. The problem is not that these tasks are bad. They are all very good.
The problem is that we get so distracted by accomplishing our tasks that we often fail to see that Jesus is sitting right there with us as we do them.
Mary sees Jesus. Mary truly sees that is Jesus is with her. Mary sees what a gift Jesus is. Jesus tells Martha that “Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:42). Our savior will not be taken from us. The love of Jesus is there for us and will not ever be taken away.
The problem is that we so easily get lured into the idea that we are defined by what we do. Our value is based on our accomplishments rather than who we are. We are God’s beloved children. We are people with whom Jesus wants to spend time and teach and love. We are God’s beloved children.
Do you sometimes forget that? I know that I do. So, I ask: “Who are you?” Are you someone with a million tasks to get done? Are you someone who has accomplished a million tasks? Is your life defined by what you do?
Let me pitch an idea your way. It is a lovely and freeing idea. Jesus actually wants to define who you are. You are a child of God. You are more than your tasks. You are more than your accomplishments. You are more than your distractions. You are someone loved by Jesus the Christ. You are someone worth dying for on a cross. That is who you are. And, Jesus desperately does not want you to get distracted from that.
A while back, I heard the story of a young family, whose busy lives were getting so out of control that they got everyone together and held a family meeting. They looked at their list of family activities, ranked them in order of importance of how meaningful they were, and the ones that showed up on the bottom were to be cut from family life.
After the family ranked what they did, to their shock, they found that church was at the very bottom of their list. Though it seemed almost immoral, they decided that they would let their pastor know that they were really considering leaving the church. It just was not a priority in their lives.
Now, there are many conclusions you can derive from this story. You can conclude that the church needs to better connect with people’s lives. You can despair that people are losing a sense of Sabbath, and do not see the need for rest in this busy world. As I said, there are many conclusions you can derive from this story. What I would like to point out is that this family’s list of meaningful things was defined by what they did. It was not defined by who they were.
There is only one way of discovering who you truly are. You find out who you are by sitting with Jesus and allowing him to teach you who you are. You find out by hearing his words of grace and listening to his teachings. That is how you find out who you are.
I am not trying to condemn this family by any means. Thankfully, this family went to their pastor with their concerns. And, I will have you know that they did not leave their church. Rather, this was the wakeup call, awakening them to their distractions. They were distracted from Jesus. They were distracted from who they were.
It is easy to become distracted and forget who you are. But, if you see Jesus in the room, take a seat at his feet. Jesus will tell you who he is and who you are. Jesus will tell you that you are a child of grace and love. Rather than allowing the things that distract you to shape who you are, Jesus will shape the many things that you do. With Jesus, you are no longer held hostage to the many distractions. You are not your distractions. You are a child of God.
So, allow Jesus to draw you away from the distractions, and take a seat at his feet. After-all, Jesus is in the room. Listen to the gift he has to offer you as the guest in your home, and discover who you truly are; O children of the most high.
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