“Do not be afraid” the angel said to Joseph. “Do not be afraid…” We hear these words constantly coming from the mouths of God’s heavenly messengers as they appear spectacularly to frightened mortals. The appearance of a divine angel in the middle of an ordinary night is quite enough to make anyone jump. Heck, my cat meowing suddenly from the darkness of a 3am bathroom run is enough to make my blood go cold.
But actually, the fear the angel talks about is not the fear that comes from a sudden angelic appearance out from the shadows. Rather, the full line reads, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife...” (Matthew 1:20). Joseph’s fear in the middle of the night has nothing to do with the angel appearing in a dream, rather it is a more mundane and common fear faced by many couples who are dating; committing your life to someone even though there is uncertainty in the relationship.
Like many men before him and many after, Joseph questions if Mary is appropriate marriage material. The fear does not appear to be unfounded. While they were engaged, but before they lived together, Mary is discovered to be pregnant. Joseph knows that he is not the father. He is rightfully fearful that Mary does not share his sense of commitment. He is afraid that his future with Mary will never be what he had desired.
You can imagine the broken dreams that litter Joseph’s nights. I am surprised that he is even able to fall asleep in the first place. I have been kept up through the night for much less. The short way to say it is that Joseph was afraid to spend his life with someone he feared did not actually want to be with him. Being the good man that he is though, Joseph decides to part ways with Mary quietly, so as not to embarrass her.
But, after that decision, Joseph is given the opportunity to change his mind. This will not be the last time that we see minds changed in the gospel of Matthew. In fact, it is a theme that we see again and again in the Bible. Even Jesus famously changes his mind when persuaded by a woman to heal her child, even though she is a gentile and not one of the children of Israel. Jesus was resistant to the healing, even going so far as calling her a dog, but he is persuaded to change his mind and show the woman and her child mercy.
God does that you know. As often as we are told that God is unmovable and unchangeable, we find that from the very start of creation God changes God’s mind all the time. In the beginning, God promised that if Adam and Eve ever ate from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, on that very day, they would certainly die. But, God’s mind is changed after they eat from the tree. God does not kill them. God decides to show mercy.
We see it again in Exodus when the people of God fashion a golden calf and choose to worship it instead of worshiping the Lord. The scriptures say that God’s wrath burned hot against the people, so that they might be consumed. But, Moses pleaded on behalf of the people, reminding the Lord that God shows mercy. God changes God’s mind and relents from the destruction that was planned. God decides to show mercy.
Do you see a theme going on here? God changes God’s mind constantly from anger to mercy; from condemnation to forgiveness.
Now, let us bring this idea back to Joseph and his dilemma. The Bible says that Joseph was a righteous man. That means that Joseph maintained a close relationship with God, and sought to live his life in line with God’s ways, as all of us try to do. Quietly dismissing Mary, who he thought was unfaithful, would not rub against what he had been taught was in line with God’s ways. Not only was it religiously permissible to dismiss Mary, but it also would help to relieve the sleepless nights of confusion. It seemed to be the only right and good thing to do.
But, Joseph would soon be given a divine chance to change his mind. Remember that angel? Remember the fear Joseph had in continuing to be connected with Mary? The angel says, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.”
Hopefully, Joseph is convinced. Hopefully, Joseph changes his mind because there is a lot of good news in this proclamation! The Bible says that the child to come will be called, “Emmanuel” which means, “God is with us.” In this child, God has chosen to come and be with us. God has chosen to come and show us mercy. God has chosen to come and free us from our sins. Jesus is to come and live up to his name which means, “the Lord is salvation.” Jesus means, “the Lord is salvation.” Salvation is to come through this baby. Mercy will be shown. And, all of this can happen if Joseph changes his mind.
This is where it gets real. I do not know about you, but I like being right. I pride myself in being deeply knowledgeable about many things. I like being right and I abhor being wrong. I know that I am not alone. One of you, who will remain nameless, has told me about the fights you would have with your siblings, and how even though you realized you were wrong in the middle of a heated debate, the fight would continue anyway because it was no longer about the truth, it was about winning! It was not about actually being right; it was about everyone thinking that you were right. Those are two separate things. Hordes of people will follow false prophets, but the number of people in the movement does not necessarily equal being right.
The truth is the truth no matter what.
So often in life, God invites us to change our minds. God invites us to change our direction. God invites us to do the very thing that God has so often done throughout history and change our minds and hearts of stone to minds and hearts of mercy.
I know. This is hard. Some people do not deserve mercy. Some people deserve nothing but the condemnation that they have earned. Some people will simply chew the up the mercy you have shown and spit it out into the mud. I know. I know. Some people will just take that mercy and nail it to a cross to die. God knows. God understands completely. The baby Jesus, Emmanuel, God with us, the joy of the world, ends up on a cross. Showing mercy is hard. But, it seems to be who God is.
I do not know. Maybe, God does not so much change God’s mind, but rather chooses to act out of who God truly is at heart; a God of love. Only divine love will withstand the cross. Only divine love will show mercy after it has been spit upon. Only divine love will save the cruel world, not through punishment, but by showing mercy. It is divine love that comes to us at Christmas. A divine love that can walk and talk and teach and die and save is what is born at Christmas. Mercy comes to us at Christmas.
Maybe, the angel does not so much ask Joseph to change his mind, but instead asks him to act out of the mercy that already is the bedrock of his life. The Bible says he was a “righteous” man who contemplated having compassion and dismissing Mary “quietly” rather than in a show of shameful public persecution. When faced with the choice of “being right” or “showing mercy” which does Joseph choose?
“When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took [Mary] as his wife, but had no marital relations with her until she had borne a son; and he named him Jesus.” May God’s mercy be your bedrock today and every day.
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